Now listen up fellas, and you will hear
A lesson that might make you shed a tear
It don’t matter how loud you shout
The size of your bulge is all we care about

You need eight inches to take this ride
If you only have seven, just run and hide
If only got six, give yourself a hand
If you’re under five, don’t ever come around again

What I’m saying is sad but true
Not much that you fellas really can do
So don’t get mad, no reason to erupt
It’s not our fault if you don’t measure up

You need eight inches to take this ride
If you only have seven, just run and hide
If only got six, give yourself a hand
If you’re under five, don’t ever come around again

You need eight inches to take this ride
If you only have seven, just run and hide
If only got six, give yourself a hand
If you’re under five, don’t ever come around again